Sunday, June 17

Fat Girl in Florida

Hello everyone! If you've 'liked' my Facebook Page, you'd know that I'm on vacation right now! I'm visiting my grandma and her husband in Bradenton, Florida.. which apparently has been deemed the top retirement area in the country. Yeeeah. So anyway, last night Mommom, Mom, and I had to stop at the drug store to get some things, and I just happened to come across this bullshit product line.
I've heard of the Skinny Girl margaritas and whatnot, but I had no idea that this stupid shit existed. So, naturally, I was pissed. What the hell is up with this? Am I allowed to use these products, being a fatgirl, or am I the target customer for these products, being a fatgirl? They have these beauty products; lip gloss, skin exfoliants, smoothing and firming body lotion, the whole shebang. This is ridiculous.

I ventured over to their website, where you can find diet pills, motivational quotes, among tons of other skinnygirl things. They even have vitamins for their customers, because eating real food to get real vitamins isn't the goal of this company. You're supposed to detox and take diet pills and brush your teeth right after you eat so you won't want to eat again.. and take vitamins to make up for what you're missing out on. Then, I saw this.
"Being naturally thin is a practice." Being naturally thin is a practice?! You don't practice what you naturally are, you just are. I could understand if the quote was something like, "being thin is a practice," because I mean, that makes sense. But being naturally anything isn't a practice, it's just what you are! That's like me saying that my being naturally fat is a practice. It's not a practice, I'm not working towards being fat everyday, stuffing donuts and cheeseburgers in my mouth. I'm just a big woman.

Scoping around their site also proves that in order to be that naturally thin person and practice that lifestyle everyday, you also need to be naturally fucking rich because their products are insanely expensive. This is feeding into the idea that fat people are poor because they're lazy, and rich people are thin because they work hard. Think this has to do with pay inequality between fat and thin people? Ya think? Just a bit? I digress. As you all know, I'm not bashing thin people, I'm just trying to survive in a world that doesn't recognize me as a full person in practically anything.

Since being here, I've felt kind of off with my body. I don't know why, maybe the flight. Maybe the bikini stuff. Maybe the scale that I stepped on when I got to my grandmother's house. I stepped on it and immediately knew that I shouldn't have. I kept thinking, there's no way I've gained almost 50 pounds since August! I wasn't even paying attention to the fact that this scale is super old and outdated, and that I feel better now than I probably ever have. Mentally at least. Physically, my body kind of has been hating me. I've been feeding her bad things, I've not been taking care of her as much as I can. I'm changing that. But, anyway, for as long as I can remember, my grandma has been dieting. She's always either been counting points or keeping a food journal. She has always looked the same to me. Like Mommom.

I had a salad yesterday and put my bowl in the sink to find a Sensa container in the windowsill. All of this shit is super triggering, and just makes me feel blah.
So yeah, I guess my problem here is that this diet-pusher culture is everywhere. It's inescapable. I am a pretty confident person, and it's bringing me down. I guess I'm also crabby because my legs were burnt to a crisp from being at the pool yesterday, and I can't get comfortable in any position that I sit/lay/stand in. Whatever, I'll be crabby.

What do you do when our diet-culture is kicking you in the stomach? When it isn't about health, but about the way that you look?



  1. I think that maybe "getting thin" could be a practice, and "getting fat" could also be one. I know that it took me overeating daily for quite some time to get fat. But to stay fat? That just takes me eating normally. I could eat balanced, healthy meals, get moderate exercise, and stay at this weight forever. And I try to remind myself that whenever I feel shitty about myself, that the way my body carries weight does not tell the health of my body. And that's more important to me.

    1. I totally understand what you're saying, and overeating the wrong foods is terrible for us, but there's more to it than that. Have you ever read Fat Girl Posing's blog? You should really check it out, she has toooonnnns or resources! She links her readers to lots of studies. One was ton of thin prisoners, in hopes of showing that overeating causes fatness in people. Long story short, their bodies naturally burned more calories while overeating and having no activity.. in order to stay at their natural, predetermined body weight.

      Overeating and huge portions definitely do not help us, so I'm definitely not suggesting that. It's just something to really look into, and getting our minds out of that 'diet-culture' mindset could really help our people. I know that the weight I am right now could easily not be the weight that I'm supposed to be, but there's a reason why I'm bigger and someone eating the same things that I do is thin.

      Check it out, and thanks for the comment! :*