Happy Friday the 13th, everyone! Hope you're having a super superstitious holiday, today. I stumbled across a blog that I think everyone should read, and it really inspired me, and many of my next Fat Friday posts will be about things from said blog.
But today, Fat Friday is dedicated to me (or other fat women) NOT BEING YOUR FAT FETISH. I am not your object of desire because of my fat rolls. I'm not your play-thing. Just to get that out in the open.
I've had a certain admirer for awhile now. He's cute. He works in food. He's a he. Okay. We were getting to know each other through texting and he suddenly sends me a text asking me if I had any fetishes. Um.. what? So.. I said, um, what? And he said he had one. He labels himself as having a fetish called Feederism. Go on, click the link. You know you wanna.
So, anyway. There it is. This guy remembers me from class and is talking to me because I'm fat. Not because I'm pretty or because I'm sweet, but after telling me this fetish, I realize it's because I'm fat. There's a stigma behind fat women, in particular, that we are insatiable. We can't be tamed. We're always hungry. Well, didn't you know that's why we're so fat? Since we're so hungry we are mean dick suckers, right?
Anyway, Wikipedia so nicely defines Feederism for us:
Feederism describes sexual relationships where both members obtain gratification from the gaining of body fat. Feederism refers to the acts of feeding, encouraging eating, or being served large quantities of food. Sexual pleasure is derived from the act of eating itself, and/or from the process of becoming fatter. Pleasure may be derived from specific changes to specific areas of the body.
The National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance specifically condemns feederism, claiming that the practice typically involves coercing a person to become larger. NAAFA compares this to the practice of coercing a person to become thinner and instead focuses on acceptance.
After reading this, I realized.. oh, is this why he's given me free food before? Talking to some people at work I realized something. Was he giving me free food so I'd gain weight so he'd be able to get off with this fetish? Doesn't the definition clearly say the word 'both'? I had no idea of his fetish at the time, so I was unknowingly participating in it.. isn't that weird? I digress. He starts defending himself, saying the act of someone eating doesn't turn him on, and that he doesn't necessarily want women to gain weight.. he just likes big women and didn't know what to call himself.
So, naturally, I ask him, why do you call yourself a feeder if you don't get turned on from women eating/gaining weight? Did you just need a label for liking big women because society says you aren't supposed to be turned on or even like big women in the first place? So you have to come up with this ridiculous nonfetish fetish to feel better about yourself? To explain to bigger girls why it is that you like them? As if you liking me is some favor to me? I should be grateful? Um, no thanks. I happen to love how I look and you people who think that way can kiss my ass.
So, to make my point. I'm not your fucking fat fetish. I don't need you to like me or to want to have sex with me. I don't fucking need it.
xoxo
CORTNIE <3
This is a super interesting topic. I just mentioned in my other comment to your blog that you should watch that True Life episode of "I'm Happy Being Fat" or whatever it's called. There's also another one called "I'm a Chubby Chaser" that talks about very similar things, mostly having fat fetishes. I'm torn on this topic. I can definitely see your side of how it can be that you are just being used as a "fat girl" to satiate that guys fetish. That is not right. However, I feel bad for any guys who are attracted to heavier girls, the same way that I may be attracted to tall guys or guys with dark hair, and then that person is considered just a fetishest or something. I don't think it's bad that there may be something about a person that makes you notice them and want to get to know them more. But how do you know that that person is genuinely interested, and not just using you because of their fetish? And as you pointed out, why does he have to name himself... is it because society says it's wrong to like a bigger woman? If so, that's not right.
ReplyDeleteAs a side note, there was one part of the "Chubby Chaser" True Life episode that REALLY pissed me off. The straight guy on the show said that he preferred bigger girls because he had been hurt/cheated on by skinnier girls, and that he was never jealous about bigger girls because he knew no one would hit on them. That pissed me off SO MUCH! It was funny though, because one girl on the "I'm Happy to be Fat" show talked about she got much more attention from men since she had gained weight, and was much more confident than before, and did not want to lose weight even though her doctor said she was at risk for complications. So the fact that that guy assumed that bigger girls wouldn't get attention was not only a dick move, but turns out to really not be true!
Well that's irritating. I actually get a lot of attention. That's funny. Fuckin' Chubby Chaser is a term that I absolutely despise. BARF.
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